Where you go?

Dear bloggy,

I feel uneasy lately. It is not that I'm sicked or stressed out for my final. That feeling comes again. Emptiness inside my heart. They say if you feel Allah in your heart, then that would be enough, as if I have everything.

But I'm in not at that level. Maybe, my journey is far ahead before I could really 'feel' it.

Dear bloggy,


Can I really mask this sadness? 
I'm really tired of crying. When I was younger, I'm this bad tempered girl that would throw tantrum to anyone I like. I always fight hard to get what I want the most, but I grow up to be this fragile girl.


Thanks to my high school. They really thought me to consider others feeling, to serve them, to make them happy - even it is means, to ignore yours.


But, at this moment, if I explode I would just cry my heart out. Furthermore, I'm powerless, my body had restrained itself from wailing, screaming or even crushing people.

Oh, I feel pathetic.
Because I am.

Dear bloggy, can you find my thing for me? I kinda lost it. I lost the most precious belonging I ever posses.  I lost my SPIRIT.