Sunday, February 20, 2011


Event for today
BIO - Presentation human physiology
Chemistry - Compilation Lab report
Malay - no idea
Business - discussion of Reach Out
English - Free period
3pm - Test Math SL

* and I am just finish reviewing Math SL


Friday, February 18, 2011

A - for a day

Today is academic day, nothing big, the list is out. We can check their names on the board, checking whether you are compulsory or not - attending the academic day. And my name is not there, I don't know whether it is a good news or not.
Some part of myself want to be in the LRC- discussing my studies with my teacher. Talking heart to heart, listening to suggestion and potential improvement method. But, yeah obviously

The priority will be those, who came with parents. Hahahaha, obviously my parents could not be here. At this time. Suddenly, I felt homesick, seeing people chaperoned by their parents. Laughing with each other, teasing, making fun ........
Yah, not now. Mom is getting better alhamdulilah, but her left ear is dysfunction. I don't know why.

The another part of me, just want to spend my Saturday by cooking the CHEMISTRY books, and eat it. Love chemistry, yay!

And, I saw lala and his mom. He is scrappy (like Dalilah said ) but his mom is quite fashionable. I wonder if I ever have a chance to hey to him - or his mom. Duh!

The moment I went to DS (dining hall), I saw him and his mom, sitting right beside the female sink-(hand-washer). I swear, my heart rate is so fast, and using Physiological theory -it explains my heart might had sent wavelength to lala. He is just an inch beside me, when I was washing my hands.

Looking down, I am thinking what happen in the future. Will I ever see him again? Will I ever had the chance to stalk him from distance while eating in dining hall. Will I?

You will not, JAM.
I should forget him, before the time forcing me to do that.

It is a little too late


Now, the clock shows 830 pm. I knew he already passed the boarding gate Huh, I am drained and frustrated. There are 2 main reasons affect me emotionally and physically.

1) I pay a visit to a nearby dentist just now. Getting amalgam stuck inside my decaying tooth, make it functions properly. But I swear I will never forget the FEEL of the injection of the needles that stuck between my gum. Allahuakbar, thats the only word I keep repeating inside my heart, hoping the pain will be swept away together with my tears . I am SCARED of denstist!!

2) The ultimate reason is I DIDNT MANAGE TO FULLFILL MY PROMISE. My twin. JJ is about to fly to aussie. Yet, we are not too close but I do appreciate him, as brother of mine. I told him I will send him, chaperone him to the INTERNATIONAL GATE, waving endlessly until he gone. Until he is nowhere to be seen. Until I am sure, he is in the right track to fly to Kangaroo Island. Until I see the smile of his face fades, as his body vanished.

But due to inevitable reasons, I am not there when he is leaving.

Dear Jerry J. Wen,

In real life, there are times when you will be on top of the world. Today you had proven the glory are yours. KLIA will be the witness of the success pathway you are about to create, the aircraft will be the witness of the destination you are about to leave your track.

Congratulation for your success, I guess this will pay YOUR hard work all this while. Be proud being a Sabahan, Be proud you are part of Kadazan, and Be proud of being called Malaysian. Now, you deserve your rewards YET be consistent in your studies. I know you are a smart boy, but don’t get too anxious or overwhelmed with the new environment. Mingle around is okay, but don’t forget your sumandak. Hahaha.. I’ll pray for you. Take care.

Till we meet again, JJ

Thursday, February 17, 2011

crossing line

What had I done today?

* escape remedial Malay A1 at 3pm ( overslept)
* escape the talk given by Czech Republic ambassador ( reason as mentioned above)
*didn't play volleyball nor basketball ( ",)
* late submission for Biology lab reports
* haven't pass up my TOK hard copy ( yet, I am successfully upload it in TURN IT IN)

What makes me happy today?
* Pn. Anita gave me a souvenir from Singapore.
* I saw lala at night :)
* I had a long siesta!
* Now, I am doing my homework!

74 days to do. Ya Allah, Ya Rahman Ya Rahim. :)

Friday, February 11, 2011

Apologize for my Only One

I called my abah just now. As usual, I told him about knowledge from ‘usrah’. This time is about the benefit ‘wuduq’ and 3 things that can save us from being punished in our grave. The 3 things are knowledge that is beneficial for others, the sincere donations and pray from a ‘solehah’ children. Tears rolling down my face, Alhamdulilah. It is a simple word but carry a BIG MEANING.

Thank you Allah, for being the Most Generous lover, for listening to my pray and recitation. For make my ultimate dreams become reality. And give YOUR Shine to brighten our pathway. Living as a real Muslim family. But, Ya Allah, please don’t let my love for HUMAN more than my love for You Allah, My Only One.

Every day is a precious day, at least Iam still alive. Still have the ability to inhale the oxygen and release carbon dioxide. To see the wonderful and colourful world with my two eyes. To listen to His words , healthy body to perform solah, and brain- to think about Him. Dear Allah, alhamdulilah. I am sorry for starting things without basmalah .I’m sorry for the ungrateful attitude towards everything You grant upon me. Astagfirlah, I am been forgetting to be grateful for everything you bestowed upon me. Astagfirlah, Sorry when I put other things before You. I am sorry for being too busy with my study and sometimes delay my solah. I am sorry for staying up late for finishing TOK, EE , IA but not for performing solah hajat, tahajjud and taubah. I am sorry for succumb to my lust for food without being grateful for the rezki.

Narrated Anas ibn Malik: Allah's Apostle (peace_be_upon_him) said: Allah is pleased with His servant who says: Alhamdulillah while taking a morsel of food and while drinking. Sahih Muslim

Ya, Allah guided me with Islam, let it blooms in my heart, soothe in my body and show me the straight pathway to pass through. Ameen.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Saturday, February 5, 2011

6 goals, 6 Balls!

6 goals, 6 Balls!

After taking some time, I wish to change the title to “ 6 rings and 6 basketballs”. J

Today is the last day for the KMB-ian students to have a last blast break. Obviously, tomorrow is Monday, which means official class will start at 8 am while students still in mode holiday blanketed with Monday Blues. The transaction mode really annoyed the teachers. They are so motivated to teach, while the students are demotivated to learn. Excuse me, most of the students. Ehem( clear throat) hahha

For the year 2’s, we have less than 3 months to go. But some still struggle finishing and editing their EEs, generate critical thinking to write TOK essays, searching for a new title for RE-DO TOK presentation, LAB Reports and some non- study oriented thingy. Yet, everyone knew that we are running out of time, but nothing can be done to make it stop ticking. Even if we can, the time will not succumb to us, it will still pass by, leaving us far behind.

So, there is actually 6 balls I wanna share with the readers,( if they are reading), on how to tackle the last minute syllabus. Bear in mind, I wasn’t a great student, but I got this from my friend’s sister who is currently studying in UK. I am not saying she is the best achiever to share the ingredients of success, but who knows it might help you. And sorry, some of the tips are blended with my personal perspective. Enjoy!

1)MALAY A1 - Read a lot of good articles such as Dewan Sastera, see the style of the writing and practise to write it.

2)English HL/ SL – Okay, I am not great enough for English, but I would say read a lot. Again! Magazines and song lyrics helped me a lot in improvise my vocabulary but not my grammar or sentence structure. While some might find Readers Digest is useful, I rather feel it boring because it is too lengthy. Useful tips, read any English materials that you find interesting. In writing essay, you should know better of yourself. I am more likely to choose essay which is semi formal, because I cannot bear with formality. Even if I can, but not as good as crapping in semi formal- such as diary or movie review.hahha. In paper 1, especially the hard-to-understand text C, it is recommended for you to google for classic short stories. Familiarize yourself with Classic English words to further strengthen your vocabulary.

3 (a)Biology HL – She said “ Read slowly and digest the correct term. It is advisable for you, to write notes before IRP session. I usually read 1 whole chapter, and based on the assessment statement, I would write my own notes with no or little reference from the IB Biology books. Later on, check the missing information and read the answer scheme from IB Question Banks. IB study guide help me memorize them faster, but your notes should be complete and better than it. It is easy to see whether you are excellent in memorizing or not, by re-telling your friend the whole concept. If you get it right, then you are mastered the concept. Bravo.

3(b)PHYSICS HL – sorry. No idea.

4) Chemistry HL – She said “As for chemistry, it is a bunch of concepts that you should master. Unlike BIO, it is not the matter of memorizing because the questions might cover almost 1/3 elements from the periodic table. What you really need to do, is a reliable book, for example IB Text Book,( with assessment statement), a periodic table and read the examples. Ask your teacher if you are blur or misunderstood the concept. Write a good note, and refer the answer from question banks. Especially for paper 3, the questions are repetitive in every year.

5) Mathematics SL/HL - The unspoken subject. Do exercise within the right amount of time. See the teacher, have a good note based on the syllabus outline and EXERCISE, EXERCISE, EXERCISE.

For Science Social subject :

6(a)*Business& Management SL – Case study and concept.

6(b)*Economy SL – Graph.

6(c)* ITGS – General Knowledge.

“Nothing ever great ever achieved without DETERMINATION”- I read this on the magnetic sticker of Sharifah Nadirah’s locker. This is indeed true, if you really want something, put as much effort as you can. Even some might say, SEM 3 result is a disaster, and the unfinished work is a burden, it will never too late, to do something about it.

There is a senior of KMB, who always got below 30 for her exams. And she always be a target for remark as a ‘weak student’. While you can show off your exams result which stated “ good or excellent” result. She won’t show hers, because words like “SATISFACTORY and even MEDIOCRE” are there. But she is strong, with the never ending effort and absolutely from ALLAH’s help, she managed to 36 in final exam. She is currently doing medic in Czech Republic, and the “A” achiever for most of her subjects.

“Allah, won’t test you (human) beyond their capabilities”

Remember “ See the opportunities in every difficulties ,( Insyirah )

Apart from that, have a beauty sleep and good exercise. It promotes blood circulation in your brain while rest help to restoration of memory. Pray to Allah, read Qor’an, and believe everything will be fine. InsyALLAH.

So, in our final tournament in May 2011, we have 6 balls to be thrown, or to be kicked, to be tapped, or what so over skill you have, as long as, you hit your GOAL! C'est la vie'. Good luck all.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

filter them, girls

Filter them girls

For profit sake, media and the diet industry trying to implement standard of beauty, using air brushed flawless model representation in advertisement or health magazine, resulting women constantly fight hard to achieve the unattainable image. Thinness, Fairer skin are their main agenda.

After the exhausting moment of brain storming, our English group – Anis, me, aaron and Ros came up with this thesis statement. I am getting bored with thesis statement, but my cute English teacher constantly forced us to digest how to do them and writing the perfect thesis statement for our English essay.

Tok teacher asked my English teacher “ Didn’t you teach your student how to write thesis statement and topic sentence? I can’t find topic sentence and bla bla in their TOK essay”

My English teacher : +_+ -speechless-

Sigh, now I knew the reason behind all the never-ending exercises of thesis statement and topic statement. I bet she wished we can eat it, and never forget about it, until the rest of our life. It is unstoppable, I mean all the exercises until we can score 9/10 or perfect score for our thesis statement. Then only, I realized something


As a girl, to be honest, I would constantly check myself in front of the mirror. Whether my scarf right at its place, less acne pop up on my face, my eyes didn’t look so panda, my baju kurung didn’t too crumple, put sun block before playing sport. I bet all of the girls will do the same, if not, majority of them did. It is hard to resist the existence of mirror, or even the library windows or anything that can reflect our glimpse, as we passed them by. GIRLS. Again.

As much as we concern how we look like. We have the tendency to compare ourselves to any girls around us. Be it our best friends, our idol, the sought-after- actress who is labelled as HOT, or just the bloggers who expose their pretty face in their blog.

And when we did not meet up the establish standard, we tend to be upset. Wasting dollars in the skin product that claimed themselves that they can cure our harmless disease, and end up frustrating because the unsuccessful result. Worst than that, we are hurting ourselves inside out. Telling we are not as pretty as her, as slim as her, as fair as her.... and the never ending thought plastered in our mind.

Poor us. Back then?

What is beauty anywhere? Who judged beauty, huh? Did you put the standard of beauty in the hand of the media? or the fake pharmacist that offered the expensive “ best sold” skin products? Or in the hand of guys who tell you this body size is considerable HOT? Or to those who asked you to wear braces because of your GIGANTIC rabbit teeth?

Hahaha, girls. We are all beautiful. Allah created us with the perfect body figure and pretty face. Growing up and let go the criticism. I know it hurts to receive all the bad remarks that will engulf your inner beauty.

Let them be. Filter the negative thought. You are still pretty, and as amazing as you are in your own way. Don’t change a bit of yourself.

Bruno mars- Just the way you are. This is a wonderful song, outshine your inner beauty, because it will mould you, become who you are now.

I am not telling, not to cleanse your face, skip the moisture or your sunblock, stop applying body solution or make up. Or stop playing with colours when you are about to go out, or date. Do it, as long as it makes you happy. Do it with the intention to appreciate your body and beauty.

Because, people will appreciate your beauty if your appreciate it first. This is the main reason, why I don’t wanna wear braces, even after the BIGGEST remarks I had to face during KASUKMA (sport day). The uncivilized people, who were using dirty weapon to bring us down. I love my teeth, even it is not perfect, even I will be the first one who will be rejected if there is selection for toothpaste -model, I don’t care much. After 19 years old, my rabbit teeth are there, always there and ease my eating process. Missing tooth would be a nightmare for me.

I am grateful to have good friends, who are always by my side, and be my confident. They are perfect example of the most confident girls with their inner beauty.


And them, hotty fareeza and pretty fi

of fashionable MUNA and rocky jemmy :)

And a guy, who I think, not so handsome but he is confident in himself. I never meet him, but I can feel his aura, from his personality.

HIM, pierre andre. I am a big fan of him. ;)

SO girls, take the STANDARD OF BEAUTY back in your hands, hold it tightly. And, love yourself, J

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

mischievous thought

To : Lala

Forbidden love , right before my eyes,

But I know, patient is a virtue, sigh..

My throat keep screaming shut, nobody can hear my cries

I’m not in love with you, I’m just in love at you

There is a difference,

The expectation of intimacy is never there, but I’m just a hopeful skeptic, waiting for a smile, for the moment of passing by,

Looking down, I know I couldn’t handle

But arrogant is never my intention,

People come, people go,

Leaving nothing but memory, will vanish in no time,

Having past self come calling,

And wishing you could warn yourself about what’s happening

Recite a prayer, hoping Allah will hear my plight,

I valued whatever time we had left, rather than bitterly counted it down,


Silent if the prefect line, before real distant will be a million miles,

I bet everything gonna be fine.