Thursday, May 31, 2012

33 His Knowledge

Last night I felt so reckless. Maybe because I didn't perform my asar prayer perfectly, and that explained why I felt so guilty. Sluggishly, I took wudhu and perform solah sunat .
I asked for forgiveness.I asked to be given the very best in this world and the hereafter.
 I asked that my sister will pass her SPM and strike for excellent throughout her life. I asked my parents will be bless with his blessings -both dunya and akhira, so does to my grandmother, to my families.
I asked for my success in this coming PRO exam, to pass medic 1st year.
I asked the same favour to all my friends, especially 2nd batch of USM KLE, 83 of them.
 I asked that my friends in the NuMed, Afif, Fauzi, Fi , Safo and all of my friends pass their exam, I asked Muna, Sha , Anis and all of my KMB friends all over the world, who had - double/triple their efforts in gaining knowledge, to pass their exams as well.
 I asked for my sisters and brothers in Syria and Palestine and wherever they are to be protected by HIM-The Best Protector, and if dead is the best for them, let them dead in Syahid.

The next morning, I had to skip my class due to my upset stomach.

In the afternoon, I went to dissection class. It turned out that my group table -A2 is gone. I really mean it, it is gone! A1, A3,B4,B5... but no where to be found our cadaver and the table. So, my group members  just joined the rest of the groups. At first I was in Sir Pitka table, but I felt uneasy. So, I moved to the front table, Dr K.O. As usual, this adorable professor- Dr. K.O will talk as slow as he can, highlighted the important key terms over and over again. And made me so ecstatic. I can easily recall structure, and details of the testes, epididymis and scortum easily. Today is my lucky day, I never enjoy my dissection class as much as I did today!

So, after the dissection class, I went down having strawberry milkshake and sandwich at the cafe with Harisah, Ruzanna and Nabilah. After that I straight away  went to Ladies Common Room to perform my prayer and went up again for English Class. I had this intention telling me to look up for the notice board. Well, all the results of end block assessment will be put up in the notice-uncensored, which means the name will be there, your matrix num, your component marks, your GRADE and obviously everyone can see it!

So, I stop and stare at the notice board. Alhamdullilah I passed my GIT End Block. but that's not it. I passed my Endocrine Metabolism as well. Okay, I know that's not the big deal! But hey, I didn't study much for it. The night before, I kept on complaining how awful I felt toward the never-ending-tests, I tweet a lot! I still remember, one of my tweet after the exam paper,

"If I pass the test just now, that will because of the help of Allah". ( Kalau pass test tadi, memang Allah nk tolong lah)

The questions were so difficult to me. I skipped Dr. Neha class, and 2 questions came out as essay, and there I was, acting like a genius scientist, writing down all the new formulas on the paper.

This is a lesson to me. I;m happy I know. But I'm afraid this is another test to me.

The message is quite clear, no matter how hard I've tried, or how matter how lazy I were, the result is in His Hands. After all, we are all just learning the little portion of HIS knowledge. I'm so grateful. Alhamdulilah.

At night, my friends told me there will be a tazkirah by Dr, Syeikh. He came all the way from Malaysia, so of course I will not miss the opportunity to listen to his talk. Ya Allah, this man is so knowledgeable, so funny ( the way he laughs) and mesmerizing us with the little talk about Solah and Quran. I'll update that later, in the different post.

Now, I reflect back to myself. Last night, I asked for many things from Allah,and today I can feel his love send to dunya for me. He had granted some of them.
 I'm ashamed of myself for complaining that and that when He already gave me most of the thing I wanted. 
Thanks Allah for the nikmahs you gave me. May all the musleems including me myself will always be in the righteous way .Amin.

p/s Of all the ring in this world, there is only one ring in triangle in shape, what is that ? . Be creative. Be smart! Good luck.

Tuesday, May 29, 2012


 A little unwell today, in the afternoon I felt like skipping my MDL class ( from 2pm-5pm) but considering some lecturers were complaining about our unsatisfied attendance, I changed my plan.

Summer Bummer, when I read most of my friend's status in UK and europe mostly complained how hot the weather these days where 20c is considered as 'hot' and what do you think the temperature here, in the mystical land of India ? and plus it is actually SUMMER season right now. But luckily my university is locate in Belgaum, where weather isn't a BIG problem. Even though now is SUMMER days, my body still can tolerate as the temperature range  between 30c-33c. I can't wait for monsoon season, and Frans said it is likely to fall in the end of June.

Rain is falling down Falling Down Falling Down ~~~

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

New Block

Now I'm learning a new block -Nutrition Block. Yeah, light as the name suggests but I didn't take it lightly. Final is coming up, I have to be well prepared. Talking about preparation, I missed one of my morning classes. I regret that. Everyday, my biggest struggle is to wake up for fajr and go for morning classes.

Most of the time I wonder, will I marry a pious man, the one who will pull me closer to Allah or the one who falls me apart? I acknowledged the fact that,

   Good man is for good woman, and vice versa.

That is really, true. I can't deny that this statement dragged me down to the bottom part of the earth. Every time I think to build a future with someone, I reflected back to myself. Somehow I didn't wake up on time for prayer, I missed my classes, sometimes I didn't wear a proper hijab (I'm trying tho) and there are a lot more, that I think, I need to really work on it. What kind of wife I would be?

This inferior I had, restricted me from keep on admiring ze boys. The good ones. I have this mental sickness, that alter the perception back to myself, with several questions, like
  He doesn't deserve you.
  He is so knowledgeable in religion as compared as you.
  He might prefer someone who is gentle, as pious as he is and good in cooking. but not you.

Oh right! I didn't mention I don't know how to cook. =.=' I just know how to bake some cakes, with the recipe on my hands. Cooking isn't my thing. I love food but not the process of turning the solid raw material into a consumable one. I don't need a reminder, I know I must have the chef hands to win a husband's heart.
Errr did I mention husband? I mean, to get one. Haha

So, when my friends asked, "what kind of guy would you like to be your prince?". I'll answer, " I handed the choice to my mother". I don't know whether I really mean those words or not. I already told my mother bout it, but she just laughed and of course- without further comments.

Everyday I pray, Oh Allah shows me the light. If He is the one for me, shows me the way. If he is not, destroyed the feeling in my heart. I'm certainly sure, that love is no longer pure, it could be spell-bounded with a curse - nafs.

but. i didn't find anyone just yet.

Sunday, May 20, 2012

My Rainbow -Sunday

What a great, Sunday. I must said. Thank God for letting me breath in this world up to this point. And I think too many things happened today, firstly I being selected to be the witness for the Election Day.

A: What does a witness do?
Q: Nothing. I monitored  SPR (Suruhanjaya Pilihan Raya) or Election Committee counting the vote. Just a double check up making sure they had done their job fairly.

And the best is, I get to know the result before anyone else. HAHAHHA (evil laugh)
Guess what, my roomie- D1 made it. She won the election for a Vice President position. Cool right?
When I told her  the result, she looked confuse. The face that telling me that she was 1/2 happy and 1/2 not. Pretty well not sure what she should feel. But calmly, gaining the concious of her, she vowed to use the power she gained, to pull people towards God, to carry the duty with all responsibility. Yeah. She always gives me that independent, ' I-CAN-DO- IT, babe.

Not just that, the other 'D2' won the General Secretary position. Awesome right? I'm so happy for them - both D&D.

After I'm done with the election, my roomie, Harisah and Miza were invited to the house warming of the Blue House by seniors of JNMC.

The house is located behind our hostel, but still we have go by auto. Miza said, " I never know there is a population of people behind our hostel'.
How honest. Cant blame her, along the journey to the Blue House, the road side is dry with only stunt plants and unfinished old buildings. It is creepy and 'warm' at the same time. Upon reaching the house, it was surprising because it looks like a residential houses-just like we have back in our country.

Oh, but the house is divided into half. (Sounds like I'm talking about fruits).
The other half is belong to an Indian Family and at the back portion - is theirs.
Overall, it was so fun with homemade foods, cakes, dougnuts and warm welcome. Even though they are much older than us, and some are even graduate with the title -DR (Intern) already, they aren't bragging about that. Humbly, we are treated like their younger sisters. It was the feeling that I've lost long time ago. Alhmadulilah, hope the chit-chat time tighten the bond between us, until jannah. Being invited for the first place is like  redz for all of us :) I'm honored.

The awesome seniors :) The owners.

                                        This is the 'BLUE HOUSE'. Note : That are not their cars nor motorcycles.

Go Borneo. Racist intended. :)

Highlight of the day : Marry-Me-Cake. Homemade! . Awesome Sis Dila!

                  Intially, we want to leave by uncle Mustaq's auto. But there is a confusion, that the auto didn't come though we had waited for about 1/2 hour. Ana ( our friend) called another auto to pick us up. And the auto is the one who won THE NO.1 auto in Belgaum ( with sticker at the front). Fuyoooo.
The driver had devoted Rs.1 Lakh to re-design his auto. He even managed to stick a newspaper pieces -of his reward at the back of his seat.  I guess today is just our lucky day. Syukran Allah :)


 From now on, I'll delete the link from my fb or twitter or skype. I just wanna make this corner, private.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012


                “I’ll wait for you”. That sounds freaky. Na na na, this is nothing to do with me, my girlfriend just blurted out that, she had been proposed. Not officially propose, but just a promise by a mature guy,(with a stable career) that he wants to be hers, someday. Oh.. It is either the guy is sweet-talker or he really does likes my friend. Either way, that would be enough to give me the goose bumps. You’re just 21, you’re just finished those killer IB exam, you’re just about to taste the flavor of new course- of medicine and the idea of getting married? I didn’t see where it is coming.

                Well, I’m not 100% opposed the early marriage, that is individual’s right. It is not ME, who will be anxious the whole weeks, counting day on switching the ‘Single’ to ‘Married’ title. I understand if the guy is about your age, with the intended to ‘jaga’ you all the time. Where you gonna study together, despite of different university or sharing the same roof, whatever but having one with a position, is like a doom to me. You are a student and he isn’t. He is making money out there for live, for future. You are struggling night and day, remembering every each of details on your books. That’s difference.
But what if he sincerely wanted to wait, then how long it will take? Does she guarantees she will marry him at the end of 5 years- after graduating?. Would she fall for anyone in between?
  I don’t know, I honestly don’t know. The creepy, I felt inside, -I’m sure she get it amplified maybe 1000 times. If you happen to read this, I just don’t know what to say. You are smart, pretty young lady, may ALLAH shows you the light. Maybe this isn’t a catastrophic after all, who knows?

                Wedding, Handsome guys, Hot-Pretty chicks, Honey Moon, kids (names) yap, that words linger around the conversation of teenagers. That is normal. Girl, you might like him. He is  a catchy, good looking, a good listener and what bound you so tight – cause you both had gone through a lot together.  Finding the courage to drag yourself out of the misery. I totally get it, okay I’ve been there.
                But boy, if you really want to make her, someone special then be a gentleman, go and marry her. If the condition is inconvenient, then just be her friend. Act like an ordinary friend. That is the rule of friendship. Once you broke the rule, and decided to take an advance step,- to make her someone special, then the time will start ticking before its exploding. That would be a lie, if their spouse didn’t mention the commitment of having serious relationship, to knot the relationship into something more firm. Sadly, some might quarrel against each other regarding this, and that small problem will later on lead to the hurricane.
Boy, In my opinion if you really admire someone, keep it to your heart. Guard your heart with the most unbreakable lock, don’t melt in the middle. Find your inner strength to resist the temptation, in a simple word – be her friend. Treat her, less special or just like any normal friends. And please, don’t convey any special message, that would always be misunderstood boy, and that also, kills.

Saturday, May 5, 2012

I look wonderful on it,

 Upon hearing how slow I stared my day, and showed up, quite late- not punctual for my class, Madam Sahariah a.k.a my beloved, greatest mom in the world promise to transfer some notes to my account.

In one elaborate afternoon, I went out to Khade Bazaar, and get my hands on the bicycles. Oh there are sooo many of them, varies from different colour and models. One with the basket at the front, top gear at the sides and the 'annoying' bell. After few chit chatting, I picked one bicycle of my favourite. Newbie in the town, with gears, shock absorber and plus- I asked the salesman if he can crave my name on it. At first, craving would never easy but sticker could be fine. I love to personalize my thing, maybe I love to stand out, but ordinary, dull, boring design won't get along with me. I love to add attitude in everything I did, or posses. Be it - scarf, bicycle, cards or even books :D.

But yeah, everything that happened has a dim hazy cast over it - in this case, I had to dig my own account. Mom's money is not enough to buy, this long-lasting , delicious bicycle. Overall it costs me Rs 6500 with a Rs 0.30 for the sticker. That would be around RM371.41 (latest currency).

One big problem, how did I transport the bicycle back to my hostel? They don't provide any transporter like one in Malaysia. Guess how,

Tying the bicycle with the auto.

    Now I totally understand why some auto(s) only have one door, so they can fit it the oversized-items, even the front portion will pop-out. :)

                                                This is how a DR rockin' the medical school

                                            Dr. Mariah in the future. Now that is motivating! Yeah

Who doesn't?

Brilliant smile, I shall pass the test with 'rainbow' result, or I'll face the music - of mom's lecture during skype-ing. Lastly, Thanks mom and dad for forking out the money for me, thanks dearest lieya for sending the notes, thanks MARA for the additional ehem... budget. Yeah, let's ride!

Friday, May 4, 2012

he said,

Love is a temporary madness; it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of eternal passion. That is just being in love, which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Those that truly love have roots that grow towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, they find that they are one tree and not two. 

-Louis de Bernieres


Currently : Belgaum, India
-Manipal ( Check)
  -    Bangalore ( Check)
-Mumbai ( Check)

Wishlist :
United Kingdom
Saudi Arabia

Remind me to save my money. :D