Life is about making choices. You can have red , blue, green, purple and YELLOW. Yet you choose crimson. Out of the league. Out of the reach. And you never knew the reason why. So,you make up one. You say crimson is the colour of your favourite rose. You live your lie ....
After SPM, after I left my beloved high school, there are so many choices I need to consider.
1) Matriculation labuan
Nope, I don't want to, seniors said the life is hectic. No guarantee I will get the course I wanted the most.
2) Foundation in University Malaya
Nope, 1 year will be a tough year. No guarantee I will get into medical school.
3) Engineering - University Sheffield, UK ( Shell )
Nope, my family don't want add another engineer who end up as a teacher. yet I didn't like mathematics. Oh please don't remind me.
4) Medicine school at University of Ain Shams, Egypt
Yes. Guarantee a medical school. No hard road, you are in the right path. and BIG NO. why? I love challenge, not my intended to offense, but I see average people can apply too. and get accepted. I know I deserved better.
5) IB - Kolej Mara Banting, Malaysia
No guarantee. 2 risky years in Malaysia. After than I can go abroad, pick my favourite country as easy as I pointed the globe. There are the top scorer, the best students from different states. even 16 A1's scorer. The kiashu. Yes. No doubt, this is firm. I choose YOU.
and, the new story begins.
I become the mid student. No longer the scorer, no longer the high achiever, no longer the award holder. Watching from distance, now I realized this IS CHALLENGE.
I struggle. To adapt. To breath. To focus.
Every night, I will look up the sky. Watching moon and the stars. And suddenly leaped across the hardest part, when I already made the wishes upon the falling stars.
The best part?
Trust me, this failure is much more sweeter than any well-earned victory. Because the roses live among the thorns, and when you bleed, you might as well say, THE ROSE AS CRIMSON AS YOUR BLOOD. As sweet, as Your favourite one.