Tuesday, January 31, 2012

I'm on rehab

I know I'll regret typing this right now but I just can't fight it no more. Sometimes the urge is too potent, too strong, forcing me down to my knees, waving off the white flag.
Arghhh. If there is a word that I loathed so much, I could spell it right now, is ATTACHMENT.

It got me a lot back in my good old days - yes, I'm tracking down on my memory lanes. - for nothing.

I lied.

Because I prefer to pick novels over movies, doesn't mean I can fully resist the temptation. Oh God, my head is going to crack in any time, after 2 days in a row, staying awake the whole night watching Vampires Diaries, back-to-back, ................ and pathetically, I had no control over myself. Ignoring the fact that I had class on tomorrow's morning , been escaping a lecture class to recharge myself - a wrong move.

When I lost my phones, twice. I don't really made a big fuss about it. I feel nothing, it's empty. But it doesn't mean I'm a rich kiddo, the one who can get her wish granted from Mr. Aladdin. I don't get myself a replacement easily, I ain't that well ... berada/kaya.
Yes, there was a little pain, panic and provoke my heart to sink, yet in the most superficial way. My nature, nope. I don't do searching ( after the) thing I had lost.

When it lost, it means it doesn't belong to me. It WASN'T mine any more. I'll set it free.
same goes when it comes to, people.

See, losing won't blow off your mind, without it- ATTACHMENT.

p/s am on rehab! I'm fighting against my inner self. Trying hard not to make fool of myself.

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